016: Showdown Central

produced by Julian Mundy, Mischa Stanton & Ian McQuown
written & Directed By Julian Mundy
sound design by Mischa Stanton
[BACK]

[[INTRO]]

[[MUSIC: “Wild Plain”]]

>> Scene 01:

[[SFX: The music fades into the roar of an excited crowd all around us, as heavy blows ring out from an arena some distance below.]]

FESTON: Yeah! That’s what I’m talking about! Hey Serena, look for a seat while I give everyone a very big “Helloooo travelers, and welcome back to StarTripper!!” My name is Feston Pyxis, and we have something very special planned for this episode! As you might be able to hear, we are coming direct from row twenty-five of the combat capital of the Cladrak system: Showdown Central!

SERENA: Smooth lead-in. Honestly, I didn’t think this was your sort of thing.

FESTON: Maybe not by habit, but this is something else! This is big time! One of the Hundredfold pirates told me about it ages ago, but I didn’t know when we’d have a chance to come!

[[SFX: One fighter down below lands a K.O. and the crowd cheers.]]

FESTON: Oh shucks I missed it.

THE EMCEE: [over mic, continuing under the dialogue below] It’s over! The No-Heart Kid has finally taken their revenge against Sapper Durken! You can bet Durken will leave tonight regretting his past words and dirty deeds! Now stay tuned, folks, we will be back very soon, with the main event you’ve all been waiting for! Our champion will be defending the title for the fifth time this season, so don’t you go anywhere! Showdown Central will be back after these messages!

FESTON: [recognizing the voice] C’mon, really? Them?

SERENA: What’s your problem? You know the emcee?

FESTON: What, no! No! Nothing, no problem!

SERENA: You’re turning your face away, weirdo.

FESTON: [evasive] I’m just checking to see who’s on deck. I don’t really follow this stuff, do you?

SERENA: No, I never saw what I could get here that I couldn’t find in my usual line of work. But actually, it’s got some rules, it’s usually one-on-one; nothing to overthink. Nothing like my life lately, so “straightforward” sounds great, at least for a bit. I’m…uh…still having fungus dreams.

FESTON: Just keep drinking that tea, they’ll pass. 

SERENA: It tastes worse than the dreams feel!

FESTON: ...Okay! Now for our fellow travelers, we’re currently in an arena built into the side of the Immortal Peak, overlooking the Backbreaker Mountains of planet Cladra. Showdown Central is one of the places where the Commonwealth’s strongest and most mean-tempered fighters come to teach each other a little humility. I never went for the pay-per-view stuff, so I don’t know too much else about it, other than it being literally awesome to be here! Heck of a view, no matter what time of day… unless you’re not big on heights. Proxy, got anything else for the eager listeners?

[[SFX: Proxy’s Comm. bloops.]]

PROXY: Certainly! The organization now known as the Showdown Committee is a privately owned and operated group whose membership remains undisclosed. Speculation has it that the committee’s influence reaches far beyond the Seffran Planetary Commonwealth, as previous combatants have been known to come from unaffiliated sectors of space. New and rare Showdown Central merchandise have become evergreen items for avid collectors.

FESTON: And they can be insufferable. I’ve dealt with a few, I would know.

SERENA: Pretty rich hearing that, after what you pulled with those prop spacesuits.

FESTON: Okay they weren’t prop space suits, they were replica space-suits there’s a difference. And in my defense, we both looked very good running for our lives!

[[SFX: A distant fanfare plays over the speakers, the crowd erupts.]]

THE EMCEE: Friends, now that our sponsors have said their piece, let’s waste no more time! You know what you’re all here to see! Our champion must defend the title once again, and here comes our challenger now!

[[MUSIC: Cool fighter intro.]]

[[SFX: Several rows of spotlights switch on in sequences, more cheering.]]

THE EMCEE: In the red corner: from the frozen wastes of Killian, he made his name crushing opponents and dashing hopes like the icy crags of his homeworld! I give you… Geddon the Glacier!

[[SFX: The crowd cheers, although there is some booing mixed in. There is an unnaturally deep bellow from the arena.]]

SERENA: Okay, we have ourselves a heavyweight.

FESTON: Come on, this guy could just fall down on somebody and win.

[[MUSIC: Final boss.]]

[[SFX: A hush falls over the crowd.]]

THE EMCEE: And now, fight fans, allow me to present our five-time grand champion, hailing from parts unknown! Some say she has slain heroes and broken empires! Some say she is a vengeful phantom who now calls the arena her home! None can say for sure! Her jet-black armor and explosive kicks have earned her the title of The Shadow Supernova! I give you… RAHZIA! DEYMAAAA!

[[SFX: The crowd goes berserk.]]

SERENA: [noticing something with alarm] Rahzia Deyma? That can’t be right.

FESTON: Huh? What’s up?

THE EMCEE: This title defense match will begin at the signal! Fighters: as usual, you are not to kill your opponent, and no weapons are permitted! Breaking these simple rules will result in a swift and severe punishment! Make the opponent submit, and you will leave with the championship! Now, let’s have us a showdowwwn!

[[SFX: The crowd cheers.]]

SERENA: Please, please just be a coincidence. Please.

THE EMCEE: Fighters! You stand at the summit! Now prove this is where you are meant to be!

[[Music: Mysterious.]]

SERENA: [realization dawning] That stance...

THE EMCEE: Ready! FIGHT!

[[SFX: The fight horn blows and almost at once, there is a woosh and boom against a hard surface.]]

SERENA: [horrified] No!

[[SFX: The crowd loves it.]]

[[MUSIC: Highhat rhythms.]]

THE EMCEE: I can’t believe it! Not only are we seeing Rahzia Deyma’s signature Midnight Lance right away, but Geddon has just managed to block the kick outright! Looks like that arm has lost feeling! Is this a sign that the champ is taking Geddon’s challenge seriously?

FESTON: Serena, what’s wrong?

SERENA: That move isn’t called the Midnight Lance.

FESTON: It’s just for hype! Hang on, do you know her?

[[SFX: A roar of challenge from Geddon is followed by one rush, then a second to propel Rahzia Deyma upward. A cheer punctuates another booming kick, and Geddon’s towering bulk falls hard to the mat.]]

THE EMCEE: Looks like I spoke too soon! The champ has delivered a kick from Geddon’s blind spot! Unless Geddon can drag himself to his feet, I think we have a winner!

[[SFX: The crowd is ecstatic. the fight horn blows again to end the fight. The crowd cheers throughout.]]

[[MUSIC: Metal victory theme.]]

THE EMCEE: Give it up for your Shadow Supernova, the reigning champion: Rahzia Deyma! A stunning two-strike defense of the title that will go down in the history books of Showdown Central! That’s all we have for our main card tonight, folks. Stay tuned, because we are taking it over now to the Rising Stars Bracket! Elimination matches start in only twelve ticks!

SERENA: Feston, I need to get backstage. If you want to stick around up here and watch the next match, I’ll catch up.

FESTON: Have you learned nothing about me? Lead the way, I’m right behind you.

[[MUSIC: Quirky electro.]]

>> Scene 02:

[[SFX: Inside a backstage service corridor -- crowd distantly audible -- Feston & Serena’s progress is halted by huge cyborg guards raising their doom-blasters in warning.]]

GUARD GOZ: No passage beyond this point to any but challengers for the championship. Turn about, or risk your life.

GUARD MEZ: I say let ‘em come. [activating his blaster as well] We haven’t atomized anyone in ages.

SERENA: I am an outrider of the Circle of Vatra, and we have business with the champion.

FESTON: Serena, I’m all for whatever you’re planning here, but maybe we try something—

GUARD GOZ: The champion has no use for visitors. None but the strongest may pass this point. Your credentials say nothing of your worthiness.

GUARD MEZ: Just more time-wasters! Atomizing on your mark, partner!

[[SFX: Mez’s doom blaster charges up.]]

FESTON: Not necessary, we were just leaving!—

SERENA: Kak it, Feston, let go!—

FESTON: Let’s just take a few steps this way. No trouble here, folks!

GUARD GOZ: Very wise.

GUARD MEZ: Scurry on home, weaklings.

[[SFX: The cyborgs disengage their doom-blasters as Feston & Serena hurry aside.]]

SERENA: Why did you do that?

FESTON: Okay, fine, say that you got past the guards, the ones with what I want to call “doom-blaster” cannon arms: do you see yourself getting through to the champion, getting whatever it is you’re after, and then all of us getting out alive afterward? Really?

SERENA: [forcing self-control] Dammit. Feston, I have to get back there, I have to find out why someone is using Vatra training to sell their... sideshow act. This isn’t right, it isn’t how legends are built.

FESTON: Serena, what is going on here?

SERENA: I don’t know, and I never will unless I can ask her!

PROXY: [bwoip] Then there is a way. The guards said that you need only prove yourself strong enough to challenge Rahzia Deyma. If you make it to the finals, no one will stop you.

[[MUSIC: Soft guitar.]]

SERENA: I’m not going to call her that, but… I see what you’re saying. You want answers, you gotta fight for ‘em...

PROXY: Would you call such a thing unfair? Or even unusual?

SERENA: No. [resolving something] No, you’re right. Ugh.

FESTON: Say we sign you up for a spot in the next bracket. Think you can make it all the way?

SERENA: You ever stop to ask yourself that?

FESTON: Then let’s see you kick some ass out there.

PROXY: Be sure to make yourself useful in her corner, Feston.

FESTON: Kak yeah. We’ll make sure you get your answers.

[[MUSIC: Soft guitar swells.]]

>> Scene 03:

[[SFX: Back in the arena, the crowd can be heard. ]]

THE EMCEE: Welcome back, showdown fans, for our next elimination match! In the blue corner! A first-time contender on Showdown Central, she is a relative unknown in the world of dealing damage to the deserving! She is an outrider of the Circle of Vatra, a rare sight in circles such as ours. They’re too busy “making a difference out there,” so let’s consider her first match a special treat! Please give her a warm welcome, it’s Serena, the Sapphire Blade!

[[SFX: There is a mix of cheers and jeers for the newbie.]]

[[SFX: Across the arena is a large and… gassy opponent, GUTHOOK, who rattles with chains and grunts while they move into place.]]

THE EMCEE: And there’s that familiar stench! In the red corner, you know ‘em, you love ‘em, but you’d never want to hug ‘em! Back from the Shrokka Badlands for yet another bite at the podge-fruit, give it up for GUTHOOOOOK!

GUTHOOK: Ooooh yeaaaah. Hahaaaaa.

[SFX: The roar of the crowd is intense.]

FESTON: No sweat, you’ve taken down bigger lugs than that.

SERENA: [oddly nervous] Really trying to focus here. Lots of people watching right now.

FESTON: Wait, are you serious?

SERENA: Shut up!

THE EMCEE: Now let’s make this a spectacular debut! Without further ado, fighters: get ready!

[[SFX:Guthook takes lumbering steps forward, chains rattling.]]

GUTHOOK: Heh heh heh, step into my hit-box, girlie, see what happens.

SERENA: [awkwardly] Uh, just don’t chip a tooth on those, precious.

THE EMCEE: Fight!

[[MUSIC: Upbeat xylophone]]

[[SFX: Guthook lunges. Serena takes a fast step forward, striking twice but dodging a big rattling swing overhead.]]

SERENA: Oh jeez!

GUTHOOK: Break you with ‘em, scrawny-ass space cop! Rahh!

[SFX: A follow-up punch from Guthook sends Serena tumbling back, hard.]

THE EMCEE: An opening argument from the Sapphire Blade has gotten her a hard hit from the crowd favorite! Those chains are Shrokka slag-steel, adding plenty of mass to Guthook’s punches!

[SFX: Serena dashes in, sliding under a punch to strike at the groin. Guthook falls to their knees, hard, to “Ooo’s” of pain from the crowd.]

GUTHOOK: [yelps, groans, falls]

FESTON: Yes!

SERENA: Come on, thresher-bait!

THE EMCEE: And Guthook has taken a sliding kick to the nethers! Nasty attack. At Showdown Central, we love it!

GUTHOOK: [pained] Can’t kakkin’ go for-- [those!]

[[SFX: Serena jumps to her feet and goes for a spin-kick, but is blocked.]]

GUTHOOK: Gotcha, scrawny!

SERENA: [disappointed] Ah, butts.

[[SFX: A swing from Guthook throws Serena back into a handspring, sliding to her feet quickly.]]

THE EMCEE: Serena goes for a roundhouse, but no dice! Driven back again with that heavy forearm! The fighters are back at a neutral distance! How can she get in?

[[SFX: Guthook gets back to their feet and charges. Serena steps in quickly and swings upwards, driving Guthook’s chin up before following up with a spin-kick to the temple.]]

THE EMCEE: Clean hit! Whatever that move was, it was a textbook version!

[[SFX: Time slows as one last chin shot drops Guthook, not all at once, slumping into a clinking heap. The winning horn sounds. Elated, the crowd cheers over the remainder of the scene.]]

FESTON: [ecstatic, heated] What’d I say, huh? No sweat!

THE EMCEE: It’s over! Bad news for Guthook fans, but that’s what we love to see in a newbie! By knockout -- Serena the Sapphire Blade wins!

SERENA laughs with relief.

[[MUSIC: Vacation guitar.]]

>> Scene 04:

[[SFX: In a locker room backstage, Serena sits down heavily on a bench. Feston enters, the door sliding shut behind him.]]

FESTON: Got some more ice and a medkit… see the ring doctor’s gone already. How are you feeling?

SERENA: A little embarrassed. Nothing broken, somehow. 

FESTON: The chains on that bum, there ought to be a law. Proxy, can we get a second opinion?

[[SFX: A quick scanner pulse comes from Feston’s multi-tool.]]

PROXY: Certainly. While this should not be taken as the advice of a medical professional, you do not seem to have sustained any structural damage, Serena.

FESTON: Hey, there we go! Tamp this on, here.

[SFX: Feston hands over an ice pack.]

SERENA: Thanks, you two.

FESTON: Eh, what it’s all about, kid! Need any help with the old-- [armor?]

[[SFX: The locker room door slides open and shut again, admitting KIRODIUS.]]

[[MUSIC: Sleazy & stylish.]]

KIRODIUS: [genial] Well now, well now. Let’s have a better look at you!

SERENA: Uh, help you with something?

KIRODIUS: Of course! Where are my manners, you may call me Kirodius; or Kiki, Ro-Ro, Big Kiro, whatever you like, really! Call me eager, just so long as we can open up the floor here for a little bit of a brainstorm, you get me?

SERENA: [confused] I think we could get you more.

KIRODIUS: Sweet, sweet! Sugar on both sides! It’s nothing, I just think there’s a way for you to get to the top of this thing, and that could be good for both of us.

FESTON: Isn’t that sort of the idea of entering? That you have a shot at the title and everything?

KIRODIUS: Sure, little buddy, sure, but it does get a little more complicated than that when you’re in the tall grass like you are! But here I come with a machete, I’ll make everything nice and clear. Dig this: You’re nobodies. Outsiders!

SERENA: Right, sure.

KIRODIUS: Not that that’s a bad thing, you understand. We just have to get you talking to the right people, maybe set you up with a trainer and work on the whole “Blade” angle. Someone must have the stuff to give the champ a real challenge, why not you? Could be real big.

FESTON: Oo, what’s the pay scale like for backstage crew?—

SERENA: Kirodius, I really appreciate the interest and all, but I actually just wanted a word with Rahzia Deyma.

KIRODIUS: Hey, I love it, and I should tell you, it’s been a long time since I saw the champ agitated like she was after your match. Really revved her up to see a good chin-chucking like the one you dished out in there. Gave old Kirodius ideas, you see the way this is swaying here? Sure, we’ll get you in a room together eventually, it’s just good business. I might have made her, but we don’t want the champ to stay the champ for too long, you get me?

SERENA: Thanks, but this was just supposed to be a quick visit.

FESTON: [a dream has died] Aw.

SERENA: Wouldn’t want to outstay my welcome, so I’ll just be after the winner’s jackpot and a word with the champion.

KIRODIUS: [a little less genial] Well, sure, sure! I won’t twist your arm, but your long shot gets longer without a little networking, you understand.

SERENA: I’ll keep that in mind, thanks.

KIRODIUS: Sweet though, really, should be a good show either way. But if you go and change your mind, you just give old Kirodius a jingle. Best of luck now.

[[SFX: Kirodius exits, door sliding open and closed.]]

FESTON: So, beyond the obvious attempt to gladhand you, what do you think was going on there?

SERENA: If I had to guess, I think the management is having some trouble knocking the champ off the throne in a fair fight.

FESTON: Too much of a good thing becomes ratings poison, sort of thing?

SERENA: You’d know more about that than me. Proxy, what’s up next?

PROXY: Your next match is set to begin in fifteen ticks, entering the quarter-finals. You ought to rest, and get ready for the next battle

[[MUSIC: Funky.]]

>> Scene 05:

[[SFX: Back down in the arena, we come in just as the round starts. The crowd all around is already excited. Across the mat is a lithe Soluchi fighter with several whipping limbs, who emits a rattling hiss.]]

FESTON: Just watch your blind spot, they’ve got four of those things!

[[SFX: A lashing strike zips past Serena’s face, but she grabs and twists, causing the whipping limbs to wrap together with a leathery creak. The Soluchi cries out in alarm.]]

SERENA: Big mistake.

THE EMCEE: Every move is looking sharp today, fight fans! Fariss Lash has gone for a sliding chokehold, but Serena the Sapphire Blade has reversed it! Brace yourselves!

SERENA: Hraaahhh!

[[SFX: Louder creaking leads into a full-body throw. Serena flings Fariss into the hard-light boundary with a BWOW.]]

SERENA: Watch and learn! HAH!

[[SFX: Rushing into close range, Serena does a lunging kick that propels Fariss through the hard light barrier, which breaks like glass.]]

THE EMCEE: I don’t believe my eyes! Did the Sapphire Blade just do the champ’s signature Midnight Lance?

[[SFX: The victory horn sounds and the crowd erupts in cheers.]]

THE EMCEE: It’s a victory by ring-out! Serena the Sapphire Blade wins!

[[MUSIC: Funky continued.]]

>> Scene 06:

[[SFX: Out in an open-air plaza, Feston and Serena cross the courtyard, passed by the occasional person.]]

FESTON: You think they do something to the atmosphere up here? It should be way thinner at this altitude.

SERENA: Probably. Hey, let’s get a bite of something and watch one of the other eliminations.

FESTON: Zowy idea, partner. You more than earned it out there, that fight was unreal! Do all outriders learn to fight like that?

SERENA: Yeah, it’s part of the path we choose early on. Not everybody from my home planet does what I do, and... definitely not how I do it.

FESTON: You’ve been a little different, since we saw that fight.

SERENA: Have I?

FESTON: Well, yeah, I mean, we were just going to stay for a day or two. What gives? Who is she?

[[MUSIC: Swelling contemplative tones.]]

SERENA: [a little sad] Not sure. Rahzia Deyma is a name - or title, really - from back home. It means “broken shield” in Arsyl. It’s not really one you wear proudly, and we’re supposed to lead lives taking pride in what we do. For a champion of anything to use it is like some sort of joke, in pretty bad taste.

FESTON: Okay, I guess that’s a little... But it was the kick that set you off. I saw you do it just a little while ago, that’s a Vatra thing?

SERENA: Doesn’t have a fancy name. Pretty much the equivalent of “Kick Thirteen,” but it’s a reliable strike from a distance.

PROXY: There are notable deviations in the move’s form between Serena and Rahzia Deyma. The champion appears to benefit from a burst of velocity that I cannot yet account for.

SERENA: I just want to find out who this person is, ask a few questions, and then we can go.

[[SFX: VARIEL aka RAHZIA DEYMA steps in behind Feston.]]

VARIEL: Maybe I can save you some time, Serena.

[[MUSIC: Metal guitar strum.]]

FESTON: Whoa!

SERENA: [shocked, disbelieving] Variel? Is that--?

VARIEL: Surprised? And here I thought the Circle sent you to find me. You and your corner runt, that is. [pointedly] Too little, too late.

SERENA: You’re... Rahzia Deyma? V, what in all things would make you do this? How long have you been here?

VARIEL: Long enough to build a life, and a following. More than you can claim, by the looks of you. And yet, you still come here and call me out like you’ve earned the right.

[[MUSIC: Tense soft synth.]]

SERENA: I just wanted a word. They said no, so I had to improvise. I remember you liked that move, in our seminars. Never thought you would hide behind a velvet rope.

VARIEL: I’m here, right? As far as I’m concerned, this is a meet-and-greet. You and your runt are just tourists meddling with my world.

SERENA: [angry] What world? This? I thought you were dead - we all did - and all this time, you never saw fit to tell anyone otherwise! All we found of you was a severed leg, what else did you expect?

FESTON: [quietly] Oh kak, this is even worse than I thought.

VARIEL: Listen, I don’t want to draw this out any longer than it needs to be. You wanted to talk, see how I am? As you can see, I’m fine, but after this, you can be on your way. Tell the Circle what you have to, ‘Rena, and leave me to what I do best.

SERENA: You work for Kirodius, right? They came to see me after the prelims, you know. Had a pretty interesting offer. “We don’t want the champ to stay the champ for too long.”

FESTON: That was pretty weird.

VARIEL: [bristling] Don’t you kakking lie to me, Serena, you yanat-sang. I won’t hear this trash from you. When I was half-dead, Kirodius saved me. They rebuilt me.

SERENA: They stole you. And now, they don’t know what else to do with you. You’re too strong to get rid of, but not strong enough to leave. Just a stray mutt who won’t go home, because she’s too ashamed of herself.

[[SFX: Variel steps close to Serena.]]

VARIEL: What I am is one of the greatest fighters the galaxy has ever seen.

SERENA: Maybe. Until the audience gets tired of watching you. Showbiz is fickle, right? If the ratings fall far enough, then they’ll stop caring about finding a real fighter to knock you down. They’ll just do it. I’m not grieving you a second time, Variel.

VARIEL: [dangerous] You won’t get the chance.

[[SFX: Fists tighten.]]

FESTON: [shouting to be noticed] Hey! Why don’t you save it for the ring, Rahzia Deyma!

[[SFX: The pair turn sharply to look at Feston. Some muttering can be heard from distant bystanders.]]

FESTON: [suddenly sheepish] I, mean, doesn’t this crowd seem too small?

After a moment, Variel starts to laugh.

VARIEL: Good point, tiny. Good point. That’s fine with me. ‘Rena?

SERENA: Sure. We can work this out later.

VARIEL: Don’t disappoint me.

[[SFX: Variel exits.]]

FESTON: [shaky] You okay?

SERENA: Yeah. How about you?

FESTON: I’ll be fine, just uh… gonna sit down for a tick.

[[SFX: Feston collapses on the ground.]]

SERENA: Thank you for that, by the way.

FESTON: [summoning a smile] Hey, don’t thank me yet. You still gotta win.

[[MUSIC: Concerned echoey synth & guitar.]]

>> Scene 07:

[[SFX: The fight is underway; Serena brings down her opponent in a submission hold, flipping once on the mat. The opponent oinks and slaps the mat repeatedly.]]

THE EMCEE: And Serena has brought down Hard-Way Gray in a serpent-choke! Showdown Central’s hardest puncher is tapping out! But it was either that, or say goodbye to the other arm!

[[SFX: The victory horn resounds, the crowd cheers.]]

THE EMCEE: By submission, Serena the Sapphire Blade wins! Do we have ourselves a new champion in the making, folks?

[[MUSIC: Final boss begins.]]

[[SFX: Suddenly, the ring ambience is swept up by Rahzia Deyma’s entrance theme.]]

VARIEL: [over speakers] Enough!

THE EMCEE: Folks, I’m not sure what’s happening! The champion has just entered the arena, and seems to have something to say!

VARIEL: [over speakers] Enough waiting! I won’t let this insult continue! If this so-called “outrider” wants to imitate my moves and make a spectacle of herself, then I have no problem with that. You can all watch as I toss her from the edge of the Immortal Peak!

[[MUSIC: Full metal riffs.]]

[[SFX: A huge reaction from the crowd.]]

THE EMCEE: There you have it, Showdown fans! A shocking breach of tournament protocol by our champion, who intends to eject our newest Rising Star from the running! Rahzia Deyma descends the arena steps as the Sapphire Blade’s just-defeated foe is moved to see the ring doctor! My friends, get ready for the Showdown of your lives!

[[SFX: More cheers.]]

FESTON: Proxy, any luck working out how Variel is getting the extra zaz on her big kick?

PROXY: None, I’m afraid, even after she let slip that she was somehow “rebuilt.” There are still too many options. I will need more data.

FESTON: Well, you may get a chance. You good, Serena?

[[SFX: Serena takes a breath and dusts herself off from the previous fight.]]

SERENA: [shouting for everyone] Let’s do this, then!

THE EMCEE: The challenger shows no sign of backing away from this fight! This will be a match to remember! The Sapphire Blade versus The Shadow Supernovaaaaa!

THE EMCEE: Let’s have us a showdowwwwn! Ready!

[[SFX: Variel leaps swiftly into the ring, landing with authority. A hush falls over the crowd.]]

VARIEL: Sorry you had to see me like this.

SERENA: [contained fury] Liar.

THE EMCEE: FIGHT!

[MUSIC: It’s on!]

[SFX: Both fighters lunge forward, to cheers. A one-two from Serena is blocked, and a hard body blow from Variel is deflected. The signature rushing sound of Variel’s attack comes directly after the deflection, and suddenly all sound is muffled -- we have entered Bullet Time.]

SERENA: [internal monologue, shocked] How is she doing-- [that?]

[SFX: The thought is cut off by a huge hit, sending Serena sprawling as the sounds of the arena return. The crowd voices shock and enthusiasm.]

FESTON: Serena! Kakking hell, get up!

THE EMCEE: A quick exchange in the center of the ring has resulted in what looked like a heavy blow to the Sapphire Blade’s head! How bad is the damage?

SERENA: I’m fine! Let’s go!

FESTON: Proxy, tell me you got something from that.

PROXY: Still not enough data to work with. Serena will either have to end this quickly, or draw things out long enough to reveal the champion’s advantage.

THE EMCEE: The challenger hasn’t called it quits yet, but who knows what effect that kick really had?

[SFX: Serena takes a quick hop forward, then sweeps low. Variel backsteps, catching the sweep and snapping out another rush kick. It lands like a pneumatic piston, fast and hard.]

THE EMCEE: The challenger’s dauntless attack is stopped cold! The champion is putting up a faultless defense here tonight, folks! This has to be putting serious pressure on the Sapphire Blade’s state of mind!

[SFX: Variel strides confidently to stand over Serena, lifting her off the ground.]

VARIEL: What a joke! [forceful effort]

[SFX: Serena is flung bodily towards the boundary, and as she flies through the air, a follow-up rush signals another burst of Anime Thinky Time.]

SERENA: [internal monologue, matter-of-fact] Oh. This is gonna su—

[SFX: The Midnight Lance doesn’t land cleanly, but Serena is slammed against the boundary, which emits a synthesized spider-web cracking. The fans are on their feet, loud.]

THE EMCEE: And there it is! Serena the Sapphire Blade just barely manages to summon a cross-arm guard against a vicious Midnight Lance setup! The edge barrier isn’t looking too hot, and neither is the challenger! The hits are piling up, but for how long?

PROXY: [bwoip] Feston, I have deduced a possible flaw in Variel’s abilities.

FESTON: Well, hit me, quick!

PROXY: She spends far longer catching her breath after activating her speed burst. The flaw in her ability could be tied to her breathing, possibly her respiratory system itself.

FESTON: Got it! Serena!

[SFX: Feston runs up to where Serena is recovering.]

THE EMCEE: Whoa there! We have some excitement from the challenger’s corner! [almost to themself] …Is that… No couldn’t be… [back to announcing] What advice could defeat that mighty Lance?

FESTON: [leaning in close] Something’s up with how she’s breathing! You gotta catch her right after she rushes at you!

SERENA: Easier said. [coughs, grunts with pain] That thing is so much sharper than it used to be.

[SFX: Serena gets to her feet.]

SERENA: [to Variel] Is that all they made you into, a one-trick coward? Show your face, “Rahzia Deyma!”

VARIEL: Missed it that much?

[SFX: Variel’s helmet hits the mat with ooohs from the crowd, and then an immediate rush brings Variel in close to Serena, who takes a rapid 1-2-3 combo.]

THE EMCEE: A tight combo by the champion! Those are some compact swings!

VARIEL: [taking long, hard breaths] There! Satisfied now, yanat-sang?

[SFX: Serena steps in, throwing a hard punch to Variel’s gut. The crowd exclaims with shock. Variel takes a hard step to brace herself.]

THE EMCEE: The challenger has landed a clean hit! The champion’s momentum is broken!

VARIEL: [fighting for breath] Not… enough!

SERENA: Who said I was done? Hah!

[SFX: A whip-crack of a kick lands. Variel’s knee drops to the mat.]

VARIEL: [pained snarl]

FESTON: Kak yes!

THE EMCEE: A follow-up by the challenger finally drops Rahzia Deyma to one knee! Don’t blink Showdown fans, this could be over real soon.

[SFX: Cheers and screams from the long-time RD fans fade, and the world shrinks around the fighters.]

VARIEL: [breathing hard] Didn’t know you missed me so much, ‘Rena.

SERENA: I never did get a proper “goodbye.”

VARIEL: That’s what this is? A kiss with a fist?

SERENA: It’s better than nothing, V. I can’t live with “nothing.”

VARIEL: Well. You didn’t disappoint. [breathes in]

[SFX: Variel rushes forward at maximum velocity.]

SERENA: Hyahhh!

[SFX: An impact shakes the boundary like an airburst weapon, breaking it. The crowd holds its breath.]

VARIEL: [semi-conscious] One… one more...

[SFX: At last, Variel collapses. The victory horn sounds and the crowd erupts, the loudest they’ve ever been.]

THE EMCEE: It’s over! By knockout, and in a move that could change everything about this season of Showdown Central: Serena the Sapphire Blade wins!

FESTON: Yes! Yes! Yessss!

[SFX: Serena manages a victory laugh and the exaltation of the crowd swells.]

[MUSIC: Upbeat keyboard.]

>> Scene 08:

[SFX: Back in a locker room, Feston tapes up an injury.]

SERENA: You couldn’t have pulled that kick a little? [pained inhale] Ow!

VARIEL: Don’t you complain to me now. Plus, that isn’t how it works.

FESTON: How… does it work?

SERENA: You never said why you had to be rebuilt.

VARIEL: No, I didn’t.

[MUSIC: Soft, sentimental.]

[SFX: Variel removes a boot, setting it aside.]

FESTON: You’re modded. I should have guessed.

VARIEL: Wasn’t easy to come back from a lost leg, crushed ribcage, and a punctured lung. I sure couldn’t pay for the procedures.

SERENA: The leg… That’s what made everyone think you were…

VARIEL: Yeah. After Tylos fell to the Dominion, I should have died. Kirodius found me somehow, I still don’t know how or why.

[SFX: Variel puts the boot back on.]

SERENA: Picking over the battlefield for spoils.

VARIEL: It was easier not to ask. They gave me my breath back, literally, along with a way to be like, well... like me again. I learned how to control my new body, new abilities. Learned how to fight all over again, just with my breath as extra force. I got better than I thought I could ever be again.

FESTON: Not the same, though, huh?

VARIEL: That was never an option.

SERENA: So, what, you thought we wouldn’t take you back? Wouldn’t defend you if there was fallout?

VARIEL: I thought… I had one chance to build a legacy. I thought you would all move on. I figured you should have.

SERENA: You kakking moron.

[SFX: Kirodius and The Emcee enter the locker room.]

[MUSIC: Sleaze returns.]

KIRODIUS: Well, well, I have to say, RD, real dismal showing that was tonight.

THE EMCEE: Dismal, Kiro, although the house was going crazy.

KIRODIUS: The house is one thing, but is that really any way for the game to go down? RD, your fans at home are gonna be all busted up about this, you know?

FESTON: What’s the problem? I thought your plan was making Serena the champion. Mixed signals, pal.

KIRODIUS: Since it’s no business of yours, slappy, I don’t think I have to answer that.

THE EMCEE: Kiro, come on, maybe we can spin this storyline! Start a fight for the crown!

KIRODIUS: Well, of course, that’s how it’ll have to be! Naturally, our new champ will be delighted to accept the title for the time being!

SERENA: I told you once, Kirodius, and I know you heard me. I don’t owe you a damn thing.

FESTON: We really should be on our way.

VARIEL: [steely] We really should.

FESTON: Uh oh.

THE EMCEE: You know, maybe they really should, Kiro! More trouble than they’re worth, in my opinion.

KIRODIUS: Well? You gonna be trouble, Rahzia Deyma, after everything we’ve been through? Everything I’ve done on your behalf? Does all the blood and sweat mean nothing?

VARIEL: My blood. My sweat. And my name is not Rahzia Deyma.

KIRODIUS: Oh, be like that, then. I guess nobodies can’t help being nobodies.

FESTON: Oh, that’s a mistake.

KIRODIUS: But we can write a tragic accident into the next season, or... something. Shame about that, Miss Blades. No hard feelings.

[SFX: Kirodius opens a commlink.]

KIRODIUS: Come on in, I have places to be.

[SFX: The two massive cyborgs from earlier enter the locker room.]

GUARD GOZ: Hey, fancy seeing you folks again like this!

GUARD MEZ: At the ends of our blasters! [laughs]

[SFX: Their doom blasters charge up.]

FESTON: Ugh, not this again

SERENA: I’m getting pretty tired of this place, how about you?

FESTON: Yeah, what’s the plan?

[MUSIC: Light acoustic guitar.]

VARIEL: Just stay low. Shouldn’t be a problem for you.

SERENA: Hey, be nice, V. Especially if you want him to give you a ride after this.

VARIEL: I’ll make my own way, thanks.

SERENA: [scoffs] Okay, dumbass. Just… call home now and then.

[SFX: The doom-blasters power up with bassy tones.]

KIRODIUS: All done saying your goodbyes?

[SFX: Variel’s rush cuts one doom-blaster short, splintering components. Serena activates her segmented blade, dashing in, and plunges it into the other.]

GUARD GOZ: Wha-wha-wha?!

GUARD MEZ: I still got payments on that arm!

VARIEL: [savoring the moment] You’re in my way.

[SFX: A second rush knocks the cyborgs into each other like bowling pins and punching through the door. Variel pursues them into the hallway, to sounds of crunching metal. Briefly stunned, Kirodius books it out of the room.]

KIRODIUS: I-I-I-I… I’m going to… Ah AHH… SECURITY!!

SERENA: [outside] Where do you think you’re going, chuckles?

[SFX: Kirodius runs out of the locker room, Serena stalking behind. An awkward pause in the locker room as the fight unfolds down the hall.]

THE EMCEE: [to Feston, pleading] What is wrong with you?

FESTON: Now, in my defense--

THE EMCEE howls in frustration.

[SFX: THE EMCEE storms from the room, as sounds of combat continue to pour from the hallway -- clashing & slicing metal, lasers, Variel rushes, and impacts.]

FESTON: [rolling into the signoff] I think I was only partly to blame for how this one went, travelers. Really more of a careful observer. I think Proxy and I did good work from the corner.

PROXY: [bwoip] We did!

[MUSIC: Wild Plain.]

FESTON: You can’t put a price on the perfect tag-team though! And hey, it can be really fun having a scary friend or two. I’m gonna follow the fight at a safe distance, but don’t worry! It won’t be long until we see you next time… on StarTripper!!

[SFX: Sounds of combat seem to favor Serena and Variel.]

End


CREDITS: StarTripper!! was created by Julian Mundy, hey that’s me! And produced by Mischa Stanton, Ian McQuown, and me.

“Showdown Central” was written and directed by yours truly; with a story by yours truly; sound design by Mischa Stanton; and performances by Ian McQuown as Feston, Sierra Shay as Proxy, Sammi Lappin as Serena, Alison Haislip as Variel, Alex Marshall Brown as the Emcee, Alain Washnevsky as Kirodious, Nick and Chris smith as the Cyborg Guards, and yours truly as Guthook babyyy. Recorded at a safe social distance with production help from Lauren Shippen and Evan Cunningham. Music by Ketsa. For more, check out ketsamusic.com. Additional music this episode by Daniel Birch, Jahzzar and Regular Gonzales.

Check us out on the Wave at StarTripperHQ.com for transcripts and links to subscribe on your podbank of choice, or on social media @StarTripperHQ where we love sharing fan art and other show-related stuff. Need the most recent show announcements or updates? Our Twitter feed is the best place to look.

If you want to support the show, and are in a position to do so, you can find us on Patreon. That’s Patreon.com/StarTripper. Even a regular $1 pledge helps us immensely to keep making cool shows for you, which we would love to keep doing. Thank you for flying with us; and now, this week’s StarTrip Survival Tip:

Love is a rare, beautiful, and unique thing in the Universal. However, without a proper exchange rate, it has been disqualified from the Universal Currency Exchange.