022: One of a Kind

produced by Julian Mundy, Mischa Stanton & Ian McQuown
written & Directed By Julian Mundy
sound design By Mischa STanton
[BACK]

[[INTRO]]

[[MUSIC: “Wild Plain”]]

>> Scene 01:

[[SFX: Inside the grav-lift up to the bridge command platform.]]

FESTON: What a week, huh? [long pause] McKlee?

MCKLEE: Not speaking to the Lorvian who gave me these scars, yes, thank you very much.

FESTON: Nobody’s happy about this, pal. Definitely gonna have to cut this into a two-parter or something.

PROXY: Not to worry, I have some ideas.

FESTON: That’s good, I can barely string a sentence together right now.

MCKLEE: Ugh. But he will, no doubt.

FESTON: Hush, you. I guess I’ll just do a quick re-intro. [intro, businesslike] Hello, travelers, and welcome back to a very stressful episode of StarTripper!! We’re headed up to the bridge of Old City now to regroup. I’m pretty worried about these incoming syndicate ships.

MCKLEE: Talks to his spaceship, yes, now talking to nobody at all.

FESTON: Hey, you wanna re-introduce yourself to the audience - maybe share a fun factoid about yourself, couple details about your shadowy Opaque Network bosses?

MCKLEE: Hmmph. Go and bung yourself.

FESTON: Then that’s the last bit of sass I wanna hear from you, jerk! We’re here, anyway. So you’ve got questions to answer.

[[SFX: The lift slows and halts, door opening to allow McKlee out at arm’s length ahead of Feston. Serena waits several meters down the hallway.]]

FESTON: Hey Serena!

SERENA: Finally! Hey, you got my good buddy Whatsyerface!

MCKLEE: [hating this] Ohhh. Serena, it is regrettable that it has come to this, yes? I did not intend for this to happen—

SERENA: Look, if it’s any consolation, I feel almost as bad about this as you. Maybe I’m losing my touch. Anyway, we got your goon in here.

[[SFX: Opening the door, Serena shoves McKlee inside.]]

MCKLEE: Bwuh!

[[SFX: Feston enters the command platform, to the sounds of various readouts signaling a low, urgent alarm.]]

[[MUSIC: Tense piano.]]

FESTON: So Haegan, how bad?

HAEGAN: On the off-chance we haven’t been left any other nasty surprises? We have three carrier-class vessel signatures exiting slip-space in half a tick, but their escorts have arrived already. They’ll be entering Quaro’s atmosphere as soon as the carriers make it through the slip, and we have no weaponry. In short, we could be in a much better position. Our friend hasn’t been any help?

FESTON: Not really. We have a rocky history, so they clammed up. Well, “salty” history, I guess. All I can tell you is the name “Kozek McKlee,” but that could just be another alias. Oh, and they probably work for some folks calling themselves, what was it?

PROXY: [bwoip] The Opaque Network. Information on them is limited, other than a presence on Commonwealth criminal databases. Activity pertaining to them on the Wave is carefully monitored.

SERENA: They’re creeps, and greedy ones at that. Not that concerned about who they have to step on to make a score. [to McKlee] Sit there, we need to talk.

[[SFX: McKlee crosses and sits against a far wall.]]

STANG: [chitters]

MCKLEE: Well, what would you LIKE me to tell her, Stang? She has a sword, yes, she’ll ask whatever she wants.

SERENA: Yeah, and we’re short on time. Why this play, and why now?

MCKLEE: The time window was always going to be narrow, yes, but it had to be Activation Day. When I discovered you were a friend of Feston Pyxis, it is possible that I became, yes, a little over-eager to conclude things. 

FESTON: [under his breath] How’d that go for ya?

MCKLEE: Ask the ships on your doorstep, kak-wit! Does he really have to be here, yes?

FESTON: Oh, why I oughta–

SERENA: –You’re just lucky nobody got hurt, but you gotta know that this is looking rough for you unless you cooperate.

MCKLEE: Rough? You’ll do what, sword lady, kill a prisoner? All I have to do is wait, yes? Until my superiors send their first wave of shock troops. You have nothing to pressure me with.

STANG: [peal of braying laughter.]

SERENA: You wanna test that theory, giggles? You know I know all about how to apply pressure.

STANG: [shuts up, double-quick]

FESTON: Forget ‘em, Serena, we have a bigger problem: what are we going to do about holding this place?

SERENA: You put out a call to rescue and support crews in the area, Haegan?

HAEGAN: I did, but we can’t be sure the SOS made it out properly. They may be jamming us even now. [into their comm] Bolo, are you conscious?

[[SFX: The commlink beeps.]]

BOLO: [hoots in the affirmative]

HAEGAN: Marvelous! I’ll need the thing on the workbench in my office brought up to the command deck! You can’t miss it. I’ll need the full tank and everything. Now, be very careful to make sure that--

[[SFX: An ominous comms alert tone, signaling a call from the Opaque Network, resounds over the bridge speakers.]]

SERENA: Hold that thought, that’s the sign they’re on our doorstep.

FESTON: [uneasy] My stomach is doing backflips.

[[SFX: The comms channel opens. OPAQUE ZERO-FOUR uses a voice changer to mask their identity.]]

[[MUSIC: Opaque Network Theme.]]

ZERO-FOUR: This is Opaque Zero-Four.

HAEGAN: Site manager Tranquil Haegan speaking. Can I help you?

ZERO-FOUR: Oh, how annoying. McKlee, this is what you call “laying out the welcome mat?” Just look at the state of you, creature.

HAEGAN: Don’t ignore me, Zai-dammit!

MCKLEE: Boss, it was all going how the plan said! This is just a last-minute snag, yes? They don’t even have any weapons, you could--[mouth is covered] Hey!

ZERO-FOUR: Yes, I could do whatever I want. As usual, and just how I like it. But I amm disappointed, I must admit. I went out on a limb and gave you one last chance, didn’t I? And this is all you have to show for it. Now really, what else am I to do with you?

MCKLEE: [mouth covered] Boss, please, I’ll do anything!

ZERO-FOUR: That will be all, McKlee. I’m forced to take the advice of my colleagues on the Board and terminate our arrangement. As of this moment, you and your crew can consider yourselves “former” members of the Opaque Network. As such, you are not subject to our protection... or mercy…

FESTON: Jeez. Dream boss, this one.

ZERO-FOUR: I’ve come a long way, so I’ll be coming to take Old City in a more direct fashion. You hear me, Outrider? Maybe you can give us a little sport before we wrap things up. No more noise from you like we had on Candesser.

SERENA: Oh right, Chamberpot was one of yours. That explains a lot.

ZERO-FOUR: The Opaque Network still got what it wanted, didn’t it? Do what you like, but I am taking that city from you. For starters.

[[SFX: Abruptly, the call ends, resuming the pulsing alert tone.]]

SERENA: Well, it looks like I’m on the Opaque Network’s to-do list now. Kak me, I guess.

MCKLEE: Kak YOU? You heard them, yes, we are all dead! Me especially!

FESTON: Ohhh, I think I’m gonna freak my shit off.

STANG: [yips in dismay]

HAEGAN: [restoring order] Enough! Solutions, we need solutions!

PROXY: [bwoip] Tranquil Haegan, I may have something, but it will depend on the state of the city’s shield systems.

FESTON: You didn’t muck around with those too much, did ya McKlee?

MCKLEE: [overcoming the shock] Whuh? I… No, we focused on compromising access to the power systems, yes. It seemed the cleaner option, having control of all systems, rather than finding a way into each. Is that… helpful?

HAEGAN: [measured fury] It sounds just like a history of sabotage repeating itself, is what. But never mind, that gives us some room to maneuver, at least, and the shield systems are workable. But we’ll need to get them connected to the power hub.

FESTON: How long is that gonna take? Don’t we have to defend this place?

[[MUSIC: Calm synth.]]

PROXY: If you are able to connect me with Old City’s service access grid directly, I can speed up the link, and construct a proactive defensive option with the hard-light shield generators.

SERENA: “Proactive defense?” I love it when you talk Tactical!

[[SFX: The bridge door opens, and Bolo rolls in a trolley loaded down with a piece of heavy equipment. Inside a backpack-sized container on the trolley, some thick liquid sloshes.]]

HAEGAN: Ah, good timing. Thank you, Bolo.

BOLO: [hoots,quizzical]

[[SFX: Haegan picks up a device with a large backpack goo tank and handheld hose nozzle. They begin strapping and securing it.]]

FESTON: I’m with Bolo, what’s this for?

HAEGAN: Well, someone’s got to seal up the kakking bulkheads, don’t they? 

SERENA: With bio-silicate goo? Gross.

HAEGAN: Serena, gather everyone you can, tell them to grab their Gloopers and start sealing the outer bulkheads!

SERENA: “Grab their--” oh, come on Haegan, GROSS!

HAEGAN: Just get moving, will you! 

SERENA: Okay! Zai-damn. I’m on it.

FESTON: Which leaves me to get Proxy to the service grid entrance! Bolo, you can watch these clowns in the office, right?

BOLO: [hoots, a note of caution.]

FESTON: Kak, you’re right! They’ll knock something over in there.

BOLO: [hoots, a question.]

FESTON: [admitting something] No, I don’t know where the grid entrance is, but… What are you getting at, here?

BOLO: [hoots, matter-of-fact.]

MCKLEE: Yes! Yes, please, let Stang and I provide assistance!

PROXY: I’m not eager to admit it, Feston, but we do need all the help we can get.

[[MUSIC: Uplifting synth.]]

FESTON: Proxy, come on! Them?!

PROXY: They have as much to lose as we do.

STANG: [whimpers]

MCKLEE: We are all out of options, yes? No, er, no hard feelings?

FESTON: This is so kakked up.

SERENA: You can handle the two of them, right?

[[MUSIC: Lite space beats.]]

FESTON: We have before… Not super eager to do it again, though.

HAEGAN: Can we get a move on, already? We have a plan, now get to it!

FESTON: Aghh, fine! Bolo, hold down the fort, and keep us updated!

BOLO: [hoots a “leave it to me!”]

PROXY: No time to lose, then. Best of luck, everyone.

>> Scene 02:

[[SFX: The interior of the StarTripper, as the ship flies low across the expanse of Old City.]]

MCKLEE: Not far now. Just down between those two pylons, yes.

FESTON: Riiiight. And that’s the Network fleet, huh? Zai save us, is this really going to work?

PROXY: The numbers don’t lie, and I have run them the best I can. Our victory is highly unlikely, and at the mercy of raw physics.

FESTON: Huh! Well, you’ve got me interested now.

MCKLEE: If it means I do not die horribly, that is good enough to try it.

FESTON: Yeah, that’s just you all over, isn’t it McKlee?

MCKLEE: You speak as if a fine-tuned survival instinct is a bad thing, yes.

FESTON: Well we don’t need to get into it, but you could say I take issue with some of your “instincts.”

PROXY: In this situation, we may need them. These two at least have some idea of what we can expect from the enemy.

STANG: [chuffs]

FESTON: Are you for real? You’ve never met them in person?

MCKLEE: Stang is correct, the Network’s board hates meeting in the flesh, yes. Zero-Four is especially, err, emphatic about secrecy.

FESTON: Then how the kak did they scare up a small armada?

MCKLEE: It’s all who you know, Pyxis, and who you buy, yes? They can just buy the documentation and connections they need, when they need them.

PROXY: Clever and low-risk, but with limits. The main force they can command at any one time must de-mobilize, eventually.

FESTON: So maybe… this could be a big play. McKlee, you said something before about them wanting a new hideout? 

[[MUSIC: Ominous electric guitar strumming.]]

MCKLEE: I did, yes, but you think this could be something more permanent?

FESTON: You tell me! This Zero-Four character was your scary-ass boss until two ticks ago! I just wanna know why they aren’t sending out the attack ships and landing craft.

PROXY: Be advised, we are closing on the grid accessway, but the connection panel is on a local circuit. You must find the controls and link me with the Old City grid.

FESTON: Okay, jeez, gonna be a lot of running today. Thank Zai for sprints. Prox, can you get Serena on the line?

PROXY: Certainly. Opening emergency channel.

[[SFX: A comm channel opens.]]

[[MUSIC: Strumming and beats with piano.]]

SERENA: [bwoip] --Along the northwest corridor! Tessi, get those fuel cells to the hangar, we’ll need more people in the air! [to Feston] Tell me you’re doing your cyber-magic, folks, I’m not sure how much longer they’re gonna hold the attack order.

FESTON: I was just wondering about that, why aren’t we dodging death up here?

SERENA: Because the shot-caller isn’t sure McKlee & Co. did the job right. They’re probably doing a thorough sweep to make sure none of their fighters risk taking fire.

MCKLEE: What she’s saying is, I have bought us time, yes! I will be accepting your thanks, and also your apologies.

FESTON: Will you hush? You’re about as useful as a topless space-suit.

MCKLEE: The nerve! The audacity on this zjaht!

SERENA: Just get a move on! We’re doing what we can, Haegan is leading the door-sealing squad, but the Bounder is on your side of the-- I mean, the Bounder’s in play… or… whatever, just do like you did on Rannitar and don’t screw up!

FESTON: Copy that! Bounders service, coming in hot!

[[SFX: The comm winks off. As the serviceway doors open below, Feston pulls a tight turn on the descent into a combat landing. Stang, not buckled in, tumbles to one side.]]

STANG: [yelps in pain & anger]

FESTON: Sorry! [a pause] Wait, I’m still mad at you guys! Buckle yourself in next time, you’re outlaws, not idiots! Now let’s go!

STANG: [chitters, embarrassed]

[[SFX: The crew begins to file out of the ship. The rear hatch opens.]]

MCKLEE: You are a very, very strange Lorvian, yes.

PROXY: Perhaps I am not the only one around here who is “one of a kind.”

FESTON: That’s so nice! Thank you, Prox!

MCKLEE: Mortifying…

STANG: [yips]

MCKLEE: Please describe, yes, how this situation “could be worse.”

[[SFX: The odd trio runs down the ramp to the main grid control office. Above, engine thrusters can be heard approaching and passing.]]

[[MUSIC: Intense piano and bass.]]

FESTON: And you’re sure this is the way?

MCKLEE: Stang is, yes! We were only down this way on our first day!

FESTON: Jeez, you’d really be sunk without your stooges, huh?

MCKLEE: The same could be said of you!

HAEGAN: [over comm] Pyxis, damn it, we are rapidly losing our wiggle room here! It seems the Network has completed its sweep and is sending in the welcome party. Dropships arriving in less than half a tick, we need that solution now!

FESTON: Almost there, TH! Right?

STANG: [down the hall, yips affirmative]

MCKLEE: Right here, yes!

FESTON: Gotta go, chief, solution coming right up!

[[SFX: Ahead, Stang opens a door and the trio dashes into the control office. Stang starts inputting a sequence.]]

FESTON: Come on, link the thing to the thinger! Prox, get ready!

PROXY: In position and primed. Ready for ship-to-ship root interface.

FESTON: You know these consoles, right?

MCKLEE: Just be ready to pull that handle, Lorvian!

STANG: [barks orders]

[[SFX: Stang inputs a command on a console, barks to McKlee, who inputs another. Mechanisms on the platform outside start moving and interlocking.]]

FESTON: Interface is activated, Prox! Now?

STANG: [bark]

MCKLEE: Now!

[[SFX: Feston pulls a nice, chunky mechanical handle down into position. The interface mechanism slots in, followed by a connector bracket locking down. A comm line opens.]]

PROXY: Now writing defensive protocol. Hard-light shield projectors connected to main Quaromachus grid, now scripting projectors for defensive protocol: “Shield Storm.”

FESTON: Feston to all points – I think we’re about to see something really special.

PROXY: Time to scripting completion: one tick. Task in progress, now safe to disengage ship-to-ship root interface.

HAEGAN: Did I hear her right? A full tick?

SERENA: Damn. We don’t have that kind of time.

[[MUSIC: Hectic piano.]]

MCKLEE: [low, panicking] Oh no, oh no, oh no, yes.

FESTON: What’s the play? Can we stall them?

SERENA: Maybe, but I need something I left in the ship.

FESTON: Heading your way! Let’s go!

[[SFX: The trio runs back to the StarTripper.]]

MCKLEE: What can she possibly do against syndicate dropships?

FESTON: Fair question, Serena, what am I dropping off?

SERENA: The Three-Headed Monster! You can literally drop it out the rear hatch as you pass overhead, it’s got a grav-chute!

FESTON: Is that in your--

SERENA: Do not go NEAR my bunk! You can’t miss it, I left it on a rack in the cargo bay!

FESTON: Okay…Why the chute?

SERENA: Insurance for situations like this! Move your ass!

[[SFX: The trio exits the serviceway onto the platform, boarding the ship in a hurry. Just as they do so, the dropships pass overhead, moving fast.]]

MCKLEE: They’re here!

FESTON: Prox, you ready for takeoff?

[[SFX: The StarTripper engine roars to life.]]

PROXY: Ready to make our delivery!

FESTON: A busy end to a busy week! Stang, you better get on the turret, but you may want to warm it up, we hardly use the dang thing.

STANG: [laughs]

[[SFX: Stang climbs up to the gunner’s seat. Feston runs to the pilot’s seat and buckles in.]]

PROXY: All crew, brace for takeoff. Nav-point is charted for Serena’s current position, on the east side of the hub.

[[SFX: The StarTripper takes off, making a quick turn and moving at high speed.]]

[[MUSIC: Upbeat vibes.]]

MCKLEE: And what am I to do, yes?

FESTON: Find the great big three-barrel cannon thing on the wall rack! You’re gonna have to make the drop while I focus on flying!

MCKLEE: You trust me with a weapon?

FESTON: I trust that thing to scare the kak out of you, just holding it! All you gotta do is drop it when I give the signal. [noticing Network ships] Whoop, hang on!

[[SFX: The ship banks, avoiding a large shuttlecraft.]]

SERENA: [over comms] I’m on the roof, and I see baddies! Tell me you’re close with my Monster!

FESTON: Moments out! McKlee, get on it!

[[SFX: McKlee hurries to the bay. A moment’s searching leads them to a wall rack; they pull the Three-Headed Monster from the rack, the business end thudding on the floor.]]

MCKLEE: Oh, pishak.

FESTON: [over comm] Pretty zowy, right? Get in position and hang tight! Proxy, pop the trunk. I’m coming in low!

[[SFX: The rear hatch opens, letting in the buffeting wind. McKlee drags the weapon to the edge as the ship slows and turns in to hover above the command center roof.]]

SERENA: [over comm] I see you! Drop it and move away!

MCKLEE: I do not see what difference this can make!

FESTON: McKlee, just drop it, now!

MCKLEE: Incoming, yes! Unh!

[[SFX: The weapon drops away, falling down and activating a chute. Serena does a charged leap & catches the Monster.]]

SERENA: Got it! Now give me a clear shot!

[[SFX: Serena lands, and starts charging the three barrels to fire. Each barrel warms up separately, rippling with dangerous energy.]]

PROXY: Acknowledged. Brace for evasive maneuvers.

[[SFX: The StarTripper veers off, gaining speed.]]

SERENA: These idiots should have stayed home!

[[SFX: The Monster fires, sending sustained arcs of crackling heat at the dropships, striking them and sending them tumbling down. Back in the cockpit:]]

FESTON: You gonna be okay down there, Serena?

SERENA: [comms] Yeah, I’ll give them something to think about! We don’t have to hold out for long, right? Right?

PROXY: Shield Storm sequence is set to activate in point-four ticks.

HAEGAN: [joining the call] This is Haegan. I wish I had better news, but more dropships are coming in.

FESTON: Time to run interference! McKlee, buckle in here and co-pilot! Stang, let’s see how you shoot!

[[MUSIC: Dire piano.]]

MCKLEE: I just would have to die on *this* ship. Some luck I have, yes.

FESTON: Clench up, everyone, all we gotta do is run out the clock!

[[SFX: The StarTripper avoids some incoming fire, Stang returning a few shots before the ship banks away.]]

STANG: [cackles]

MCKLEE: You seem oddly calm, yes. Stang rarely takes to people like that.

FESTON: Not sure where you’ve been all this time, but we’ve been through a lot since Medroc.

MCKLEE: With your new backup, yes, I see your point.

FESTON: Now hold on, I’m making another pass, I don’t like leaving her out there in the open. Stang, I’m headed across their rear, aim at their engines!

STANG: [more cackles from the gunner seat]

FESTON: Serena, I’m coming in! Gonna try to set ‘em up for you!

SERENA: [over comm] Aww, and I didn’t get you anything!

[[SFX: The StarTripper races past a dropship’s rear. A rapid series of shots from Stang’s turret fire off, and the larger craft turn to pursue.]]

MCKLEE: They’re turning to follow us!

[[SFX: the StarTripper dips just in time to avoid Serena’s incoming blast, which takes out the pursuing dropship.]]

FESTON [laughs]

PROXY: Feston, Shield Storm will be ready to initiate in one minute.

FESTON: Nice! Wait, “ready to initiate?”

PROXY: Yes, confirmation will need to be logged by at least one member of Quaromachus control staff.

SERENA: [over comm] WHAT?!

PROXY: I said a confirmation will need to be logged--

FESTON: We heard you Prox but why didn’t you tell us that before?!

PROXY: It’s not like I’ve ever rerouted this system before!

FESTON: Right… Sorry. Kak, how are we… wait, Bolo! Hey Bolo, you with us?

[[SFX: After a moment, a comm opens.]]

BOLO: [hoots, woken up suddenly]

FESTON: Oh thank Zai. Okay, we got a plan. Hit YES when you see a big scary prompt on the main screen!

BOLO: [hoots their confirmation.]

PROXY: I don’t think I made it too scary-looking. However, Shield Storm protocol will create dangerous conditions beyond the city’s immediate airspace.

FESTON: So we get the scary part. Figures.  We’re gonna dive in at the last moment, you with me?

[[MUSIC: Action strings.]]

PROXY: I leave the tactical applications to you, captain.

FESTON: Hmm… okay, nobody panic!

[[SFX: The StarTripper swings about.]]

MCKLEE: Wait, why are you turning us about, yes? I thought you said we had to dive in, why are you flying *at* the carriers?

FESTON: What can I say? I have a talent for pissing off crooks, I may as well use it! Stang, draw their fire, get us as much attention as you can!

[[SFX: The Startripper zooms through the enemy line, avoiding fire, the rear thruster roaring, Stang’s turret returning fire.]]

MCKLEE: So you’re going to fly at their faces?

FESTON: Well I’m in charge of the tactical applications, didn’t you hear?!

SERENA: [over comm] Careful up there, folks! Remember, you’re my ride out of here!

FESTON: Haegan, just be ready to batten things down if we botch this!

HAEGAN: [over comm] Acknowledged. If we make it out of here, I’ll certainly owe you one.

[[SFX: The StarTripper avoids some more incoming dropship fire from the front, Stang returning with glee.]]

MCKLEE: [near panic] I would say we’ve gotten close enough, yes?!

FESTON: Proxy, how we looking on time?

PROXY: Shield Storm ready in twenty seconds, and we have dropships closing behind us. 

FESTON: Just a little further...

SERENA: [comm, excited] You got this, you lunatics!

HAEGAN: [comm] Haegan to all points! Brace for defensive measures, and be ready to repel anyone who makes it through!

FESTON: HANG ON TO SOMETHING!

[[SFX: Feston cuts the engines and the StarTripper immediately stops accelerating and begins falling back towards Old City.]]

PROXY: Shield Storm ready in five, four...

MCKLEE: [life flashing before their eyes] NO NO NO NO I DON’T WANT TO DIE PLEASE

PROXY: Three, two...

[[SFX: Now facing Old City, Feston punches it and the main thruster roars back to life.]]

PROXY: One! Shield Storm ready! We are nearing safe airspace, Feston.

FESTON: Hit it Bolo!

BOLO: [hoots, very tense.]

[[SFX: Over comms, the Shield Storm input window appears on Bolo’s screen. With a big, bold 90’s style “GO” tone, the Shield Storm program runs. Above the city, enormous panes of hard-light shielding solidify in ranks, which advance across the immediate skyline of Old City and press outward into the syndicate dropships. Explosions can be heard as multiple collisions occur in rapid succession.]]

FESTON: Yeah yeah yeah!

SERENA: [comm] Beautiful AND badass! Looks like they’re panicking! Haegan, status?

HAEGAN: [comm] Dropships one, two, four, and five are down and out! It’s chaos!

FESTON: “Shield Storm” is right! If we got caught in that, the waves would have thrown us Zai knows where! Hot damn, Bolo, nice work!

BOLO: [hoots, self-effacing.]

MCKLEE: What happened, how did she get the shields to do that?

[[MUSIC: Airy cool-down.]]

PROXY: It was not a simple matter. I based the pattern on forms in nature to fill in the gaps created by expansion. The hard-light lenses are being pushed to their maximum effective range.

MCKLEE: I do not understand how a mere ship’s computer could accomplish all this.

FESTON: Not even with what you said last time we met? She’s “one of a kind,” isn’t she?

MCKLEE: So I was informed by my source, but… I am at a loss, Lorvian, I really am. 

[[SFX: From far off, carrier-sized slipspace drives blink the remaining Carrier away to a resounding calm across the planet.]]

HAEGAN: They’ve split. Serena, I’ll need to to move with the rest of our security force to secure the Network shooters they left behind. Our work isn’t done today, but… you all held this city. Come back in for dock, StarTripper, you’ve earned a rest. Only…

FESTON: What’s up, TH?

HAEGAN: Might I have a chance to properly introduce myself to the exquisite talent behind that maneuver? The IA known as Proxy, wasn’t it?

PROXY: That’s correct. I would say we’ve waited long enough, Tranquil Haegan, wouldn’t you?

HAEGAN: [rather subdued] Yes, my manners have… not been in good practice lately. Thank you all.

PROXY: Before you thank me, I should mention that the hard-light generators will require some extensive repairs after what I put them through.

HAEGAN: [a long, unrestrained laugh of relief] Fair enough!

[[MUSIC: Spritely.]]

Scene 03:

[[SFX: In the hallway outside a conference room, Feston, Serena, McKlee, and Stang wait as people pass by now and then. Inside, Haegan is just ending a long tirade.]]]

HAEGAN: [far off] --will keep me notified, and they are committed to this place. I hope you fine people will match that commitment, and act swiftly on the recommendations in my report. Thank you for your time, I should be on my way.

STANG: [chitters, bored]

MCKLEE: Yes, yes, but I think they are wrapping it up in there.

[[SFX: The conference room erupts in chatter as the door closes behind Haegan, approaching.]]

SERENA: So that’s it, huh?

HAEGAN: That is, finally, it. Kak me, I need a long break. A lonnnng break.

FESTON: Well, dang, don’t we just continue to be the most helpful people, huh Serena? You’ll come along with us, right?

HAEGAN: Yes, Pyxis, I will, and believe me, I’ll be returning the favor.

FESTON: Howzat? Sorry, I’m still a little fuzzy.

[[MUSIC: “Wild Plain” soft intro.]]

HAEGAN: Proxy explained your little travelogue project, so I’m up to speed. I am not just a zenith-class engineer, I also happen to be over seventy standard years old, and very well-traveled. You’ve been tossing darts at the map, blindfolded.

FESTON: Oh… Oh! You mean…?

HAEGAN: I can show you any number of places to find a good time, and not just by falling ass-backward into them.

FESTON: Kak yes!

PROXY: Welcome to the crew of the StarTripper, Tranquil Haegan.

HAEGAN: Hope you two can keep up.

SERENA: [chuckles] Oh yeah, this’ll go soooo smooth.

HAEGAN: It will if you can keep yourselves from courting any more insanity!

MCKLEE: Ahem.

[[SFX: The music fades; the trio turn to give McKlee a stern look.]]

MCKLEE: Er, yes, sorry to interrupt.

FESTON: What’s up, McKlee?

MCKLEE: Well, I -- that is to say, Stang and I appreciate you covering for us, yes. Even if you did throw us in the brig for the remaining days of work.

SERENA: You were being kind of a kak-head before your boss screwed you all over.

MCKLEE: Granted, however… I wonder if we might also… travel with you, for a short time?

[a long, rough beat]

FESTON: Seriously? How do you think that’s gonna go?

PROXY: I am exercising my veto power. Strenuously.

FESTON: Plus, I mean, why would you leave this place?

MCKLEE: Mmm, yes. You think they would have us?

FESTON: Well, all that folks around here really know is that you helped us keep those Opaque Network goons from storming the place. Besides, you come with us, you might run into some of those old “co-workers.”

SERENA: Guess it’s up to you if you feel like coming clean, y’know, ever.

STANG: [chitters, sheepish]

MCKLEE: I-- this is very… I suppose I should thank you, yes.

SERENA: Hey, don’t strain yourself, Mackle.

FESTON: Yeah, what, you wanna make this weird? 

HAEGAN: Kak standing around, I need a drink two hours ago.

SERENA: I heard from Bolo that someone set up a little club on the surface deck, and they wanted to get out on the dance floor.

[[SFX: The group begins to move away, down the hall.]]

FESTON: Hey, I’ll catch up with you in a tick, okay?

SERENA: Don’t take too long, flyboy, we’ll need you up there.

FESTON: You got it.

[[SFX: The group departs.]]

[[MUSIC: Aurora tones.]]

FESTON: Hey Proxy?

PROXY: [bwoip] Yes, Feston?

FESTON: You're kind of incredible. A little nuts, too. 

PROXY: Not for lack of effort. I hope you’re not selling yourself short again.

FESTON: It’s not like that. I just never imagined doing something like this before. Rannitar was one thing, but… the past week has been something else completely.

PROXY: Nothing since we met has been what we expected.

FESTON: Yeah… Just like I was hoping for. Get a load of that view, would ya? [long beat] Well, guess it’s about that time.

PROXY: May I?

FESTON: By all means, partner.

PROXY Thank you for flying with us, fellow travelers. We’ll see you next time… on StarTripper!!

[[MUSIC: “Wild Plain”]]

– END OF PART 2 –

CREDITS: StarTripper!! was created by Julian Mundy, hey that’s me! And produced by Mischa Stanton, Ian McQuown, and me.

“One of a Kind” was written and directed by yours truly, sound designed by Mischa Stanton, with a story by yours truly, and performances by Ian McQuown as Feston, Sierra Shay as Proxy, Sammi Lappin as Serena, Chijioke Williams as Tranquil Haegan, Tobin Mitnick as Kozek McKlee, and Josh Rubino as Bolo, and Kristen DiMercurio as Opaque Zero Four. Recorded at a safe social distance with production help from Lauren Shippen and Evan Cunningham. Music by Ketsa. For more, check out ketsamusic.com. Additional music this episode by Jahzzar.

Check us out on the Wave at StarTripperHQ.com for transcripts, merch, and links to subscribe on your podbank of choice, or on social media @StarTripperHQ where we love sharing fan art and other show-related stuff. Need the most recent show announcements or updates? Our Twitter feed is the best place to look.

If you want to support the show, and are in a position to do so, you can find us on Patreon. That’s Patreon.com/StarTripper. Even a regular $1 pledge helps us immensely to keep making cool shows for you, which we would love to keep doing.

Thank you for flying with us; and tune in next time for the thrilling conclusion. But for now, this week’s StarTrip Survival Tip:

Despite popular rumor, duct tape can’t fix all your problems. But it can wrap them up in a, sticky, durable cocoon, which is almost as good!